Ah! English Language — the one subject that made me question if I really knew how to speak English at all!

You see, I grew up confidently saying things like:

“I am coming!” (even when I was clearly going somewhere)

and

“Shift for me!” (because who says move over anyway?).

But the moment I stepped into English class, my teacher turned into an FBI agent ready to expose all my grammar crimes. To be honest — the day “present perfect tense” entered the syllabus, many destinies were shaken. I still remember my teacher asking,

“Who can give me an example of the present perfect tense?”

And one brave student said, “Sir, I have eaten rice yesterday.”

The silence that followed could fix NEPA light for a week. 😂

Not to talk about the Phonetics Wahala!

Then came the pronunciation battles.
They said it’s “vegetable”, not “vege-table.”
It’s “debt”, but the “b” is silent.
It’s “colonel”, but you pronounce it “kernel”.

At some point, I was convinced English was designed to confuse Africans on purpose!

Oh, essay writing! My classmates wrote as if they were auditioning for Nollywood. Every composition started with:

“It was a bright and sunny morning…” ☀️

And somehow, every story ended with:

“We all lived happily ever after.”

Except me — my story always ended when the bell rang before I finished my last paragraph! 😂

But in the End…

As much as English tortured our brains, it secretly became one of my favorite subjects.
It gave me the power to express myself, tell stories, make people laugh — and even write this blog post today!

So yes, English Language might have been stressful, but it’s the reason we now say things like,

“I’m not shouting, I’m just expressing myself passionately.” 😅

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